Diving into the Moroccan Family Values
Everyone carries something with them from their childhood. In Morocco, it’s their values.
Moroccan values are based on family; everyone cares for each other. The children are born to look after the seniors and the seniors are made out to be very wise. The family thinks of themselves as a unit not as an individual.
Young and old share everything in the Moroccan family. Most children share bedrooms, where as in Western families it is more likely for siblings to have separate bedrooms and spaces. In extreme cases, children can also share clothing.
Morocco Explored said, “Stories, water, food, money, everything. Within the immediate family there are no boundaries of sharing. Everyone works and everyone contributes.”
Rabat is Morocco’s capital city. Much of the city has a very urban feel, with clean streets, and a modern tram line running through it, making navigating Rabat no trouble at all. The avenues are full of bustling fruit venders, and a wide variety of cafes lined up on the sidewalks with chairs and tables. Perched above Rabat to the North of the city is The Kasbah des Oudayas. Built in the 12th century, this fort was made for the leaders of Rabat so that they could hide if they were under attack. The ancient fort is full of winding blue and white walls with hidden nooks and crannies guarded by an army of kittens.
Nadia Phelps, a high school counselor based in Qatar, spent most of her childhood in Rabat, specifically the uptown Agdal neighborhood. She was the first female in her family to go to school. Her father’s family is Berber, an ethnic native to North Africa, and came down from the Anti- Atlas mountain region close to Ait Baha, in the early part of the 20th century.
Despite his generation’s view of formal education, Nadia’s father, Mr. Boufous, wanted his daughters to go to school, and because of this all of the daughters born into the family after Nadia have also been highschool, and some university. Some of Nadia’s female cousins have become lawyers, architects, and doctors. In contrast, her grandmother was illiterate.
Moroccan world news (MWN) covers that, “Illiteracy rate in Morocco is more common in adults over fifty years old at 61.1 percent, but drops to 3.7 percent for children who are less than fifteen years old.”
“When I got to school age,” Nadia said,“He enrolled me in a French school.”
“For the family, that was the first time that a girl had gone to school.”
How do Moroccan family values differ from Western ones?
The setup of the Moroccan living room is a great way to understand the difference between Moroccan and Western family values.The first thing that draws attention in a Moroccan home is what Ikea would have called a surround the room sectional that has forty feet of couch. In the middle is a round table for tea coffee and food.The reason they have the couches is for the family, big families need big couches. Moroccan couches have many uses: they can be used as bed if family members need to spend the night, they can be used for family gab sessions, for Sohoor, and Iftar meals during the holy month of Ramadan. However, TVs don’t belong in this room because it is meant for socializing. The Moroccan family values are based on contributing to the family by spending time together.
“The concept of the individual doesn't really exist in terms of traditional family in Morocco,” Nadia said, “you always represent the family.”
In most cases with more Western families parents push children to achieve great things for themselves, go to college, marry the person you love, get good grades .... In contrast, Nadia’s uncle had to leave middle school to help his grandparents. The family decided what his role would be even though he wanted to go to school. He had started to learn a vocation in upholstery, but because his family needed him at home, he did not get the opportunity to finish.
An article called the Moroccan Family said, “The elderly are usually very respected and seen as wise, unlike many western beliefs. A recent survey shows that 97% of Moroccans believe that it is the children’s duty to take care of a parent when they grow old (Tbatou).”
Later in life he wanted to marry a girl, but the family said no because she was rich and they didn’t think she would want to stay and take care of the grandparents. They made him marry the girl next door that he had grown up being friends with. She was like a sister, but for the sake of the family, he married her.
“The whole family decided what his role was. That's what they needed him to do. So now his brothers take care of him and his kids they pay for him and all of that but, he doesn't get to do what he wants as an individual.”
Moroccan Family Roles
Moroccan family roles vary, depending on how traditional your family is. The older generation is very traditional, the men would be the breadwinner, and the women would be in control of everything inside the home. Nadia’s aunt and uncle were very classic.
When the father would get home, he would go upstairs to his bedroom and watch TV. He would also eat up there. He had very little interaction with the children, although when the boys were older they would sometimes watch football with him.
“I don't know if he's typical. He might be an extreme as well. But I remember him just coming in and going straight upstairs to his room.”
In contrast the mother did everything with the children. She would cook, discipline, do laundry etc. She was the boss and had full control inside of the home.
Nadia’s cousin Abdul on the other hand, is very different from his father. He plays cards, helps with homework, and watches football with his children. The whole family goes out on Sundays, laugh and have conversations together.
Moroccan family values vary, they are like western ones in that way. Children grow up with their values and pass them on to future generations. Morocco is a growing and changing country, even though it is becoming more modern, they still have a good grasp on their roots and are keeping their traditions and beliefs with them.
'To travel is to discover that everyone is wrong about other countries.' Aldous Huxley
